Directed By Rob Zombie

Starring – Sherri Moon Zombie, Jeff Daniel Phillips, Daniel Roebuck

The Plot – Lily (Zombie) is a typical 150-year-old lovelorn vampire who’s looking for the man of her nightmares, until she lays her eyes on Herman (Phillips), a 7-foot-tall green experiment with a heart of gold. It’s love at first shock as these two ghouls fall fangs over feet for each other in a Transylvanian romance. Unfortunately, it’s not all smooth sailing in the cemetery as Lily’s father (Roebuck) has other plans for his beloved daughter’s future, and they don’t involve her new bumbling beau.

Rated PG for macabre and suggestive material, scary images and adult language

The Munsters – Official Trailer (2022) Sheri Moon Zombie, Jeff Daniel Phillips, Daniel Roebuck – YouTube

POSITIVES

Regardless of if people love or hate this film, one thing that isn’t up for debate is the love that Zombie has for this cherished property. This is realized in both the tonal consistency and seamless production designs, which not only generate authenticity in the kitsch and campiness of the original TV show, but also emphasizes the fun factor for Zombie to lose himself head over heels in the madness of his wildest imagination. Because of such, it transcribes a rare-but-merited opportunity for Zombie, one of the crudest directors working today, to cater towards a PG rating, all the while crafting some unique measures in presentation to visually channel the essence and familiarity of the TV-serials age, with a contemporary quality of technology to boot. Aspects like scene transitions with visuals in the shape of species, permeating backgrounds conveying insight into the feelings of a character in frame, or even just pop-up set designs garnering a stage-like influence, are just a few of the atmospheric qualities emitting an exaggerated presentation to the engagement, and when combined with the splashes of color, invoke a hyper-coated lusciousness in appeal that wholeheartedly justifies the direction. To be fair, the film probably would benefit more faithfully from a black and white presentation to its canvas, but the ultraviolet ambiance attained from such vivid radiance inspires another dimension to the atmospheric elements, in turn enhancing the radiance of European imagery to sequences involving nighttime photography. Finally, while a majority of the performances leave more to be desired, the work of Roebuck as the Count is the one that stands above the rest, with a measurement to portrayal that he seamlessly disappears in. Roebuck is not only the only one who commits to his lines of dialogue with determination, but also seems informed as to the kind of film he’s actually supposed to be a part of, leaving him unfortunately abandoned by the entirety of the performers surrounding him who treat this as an opportunity to channel their own interpretations to the various roles.

NEGATIVES

Unfortunately, as to where Zombie is the best man to direct this film, he’s the absolute worst to write it, proving once more why he’s so out of touch with what constitutes compelling cinema. Most obvious to the sequencing is the episodic approach to its storytelling, which not only pounds the pacing to insufferable levels of dragging for a run time that is only 105 minutes, but also one that creates its own abundance of insignificance to the opportunity. This is where the film’s intended demographic tends to obscure itself because fans of the original series feel leaps ahead of an origin story concept that wastes far too much time establishing before getting to the good stuff during the final fifteen minutes, and when confined even further to a barrage of subplots, never creates any lasting drama, uncertainty, or unpredictability to the engagement. What’s astounding here is that there isn’t a long-term conflict, but rather a series of temporary ones that add emphasis to the aforementioned episodic approach keeping it from ever feeling like a feature length narrative that warrants big screen captivity. On top of this, the film is a tragically boring one, with editing bearing a bumbling brutality to scenes that feel twice of what they rightfully should be. From the opening ten minutes of the introduction, there’s a directionless sense to its frenetic storytelling that immediately conflicts audience investment, and the kind that is made even worse by the level of comedic material we’re unfortunately saddled with. This is where matters get really ugly, as not only are the buffet of dad jokes ineffective in reaching a single solitary, if even accidental, reflex, but the puns and deliveries of the comedic timing in punchlines feel directly borrowed from the mouths of theme park animatronics. It’s bad enough that the material is too outdated for kids and too sanitized for Zombie’s typical audience, but it’s even worse when the actors commit themselves so heavily to the forcefulness of the deliveries, leaving it and them underwhelmed by the material that continuously lets them down at every opportunity. Speaking of those figures, the opposing side in quality to Roebuck’s valued turn is in the combination of Sherri Moon Zombie and Jeff Daniel Phillips, who each for their own tumultuous reasons feel tragically miscast in their respective roles. Phillips, in tone or personality, can’t hold a candle to Fred Gwynne’s endearingly heartfelt candor, wasting away subtleties with a boisterously obnoxious delivery and irritable demeanor that that isn’t the least compelling, let alone entertaining. Succeeding even Phillips diminishing returns, however, is Sherri, who once more is the single worst aspect of any movie helmed by her husband. I can respect Rob’s decision to cast his queen as the lead in all of his movies, but when it’s compromising the quality of his creations, it’s a bigger problem than can possibly be contained. Sherri’s strange portrayal seems to be embodying that of an impression of an impression of Lily’s original actress Yvonne De Carlo, with bewildering hand movements that influence each time the actress speaks, and deliveries that fall as coldly and flatly as those of the various corpses that decorate the film’s backdrops. While there’s certainly a lack of depth to the actress’ emotional resonance, the lack of romantic chemistry shared with Phillips is all the more corrosive, leading to a complete lack of believability between the two, and for Sherri another instance where she can’t even remotely become the character she’s asked to convey.

OVERALL
“The Munsters” has the look and appeal of the popular 1960’s TV show it spawned from, but the disjointed storytelling, embarrassing comic muscle, and awkward performances prove more of the same for Zombie, and one that doesn’t justify the costless price tag to explore it even on streaming.

My Grade: 3/10 or F+