Directed By Robert Zemeckis

Starring – Tom Hanks, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Benjamin Evan Ainsworth

The Plot – The beloved tale of a wooden puppet named Pinocchio (Ainsworth) who embarks on a thrilling adventure to become a real boy, thanks to a gentle woodcarver named Geppetto (Hanks).

Rated PG for peril/scary moments, rude material and some adult language

Pinocchio – Official Teaser Trailer (2022) Tom Hanks, Joseph Gordon-Levitt – YouTube

POSITIVES

Without Zemeckis’ wondrous direction behind the lens, this film would be a complete loss, but because of the balance he supplants between scale and energy, it prescribes a seamless transition to live action that brings with it the familiarity of an animated properties, all the while transcribing a stylistic versatility to various set pieces. This is especially the case with the lighting, which not only luminates natural essences to what is mostly computer-generated backdrops, but also emits with it a warming glow that atmospherically enriches the gentle ambiance of the narrative, bringing with it an endearing quality of artistic merit that capably bridges the gap in making this feel like a big screen presentation. Aside from Zemeckis’ impactful work behind the lens, the value of this tremendous ensemble in front of it gives us plenty to appreciate in voice and acting work. For the former, Gordon-Levitt is virtually indistinguishable as the Southern drawl Jiminy Cricket, with a vocal cadence in commitment that never withers throughout the duration of the engagement. Likewise, the turn as Geppetto for Hanks brings forth a familiarity for warmth and energy that brings the fabled character to life before our very eyes but calculated in doses that continuously keep the role from getting away from Tom, similar to his work in this year’s “Elvis”. Finally, and most importantly, the single best aspect of the film is the newly recaptured musical score from longtime Zemeckis collaborator Alan Silvestri, that brings with it some unique surprises in contemporary channeling. Most of the selections are obviously borrowed from the 1940 original film, but they’re reincorporated with the kind of sharp mixing and orchestral instrumentals that completely reinvigorate the tracks, and when combined with two completely new and original offerings, serves as the only element of production that capably blends the creativity of yesterday with today’s technological advances.

NEGATIVES

“Pinocchio” tries to have it both ways. On one side, it plays it safe by incorporating as much familiarity from the animated original as possible, deducing it towards feeling like another unnecessary Disney live action remake, but on the other side attempts a few subtle differences that barely resonate an effective originality, especially with what’s included. This is certainly the case with the blue faerie (Played here by the great Cynthia Erivo), who is only in one scene at the very beginning of the film, then never brought up again. This dumbfounded direction carries over to the film’s second half, involving a climactic finale that not only astounded me for how its diversion not only wiped away any shred of emotion from the animated original, but also how it concludes things as abruptly and anticlimactically as you can imagine. So, it’s often a film that has a bit of an identity crisis of its own, made all the worse by the uncanny valley nature of the animation and computer generation, which bare such a creative imbalance that the production feels like it is being steered by two respective directions of the table. For the three-dimensional C.G, the textures don’t even remotely resemble the likenesses of the breeds they’re depicting, and when combined with a complete lack of heft or influence on the scenes they adorn, feels as lifeless and unimaginative as any animated property that I have seen over the last five years. Yet this doesn’t even touch the problems with the titular character himself, as not only does the inconsistencies of two-dimensional vintage animation completely underwhelm within the outlines of his designs, but the facial registries are so sagging and stilted that they often bring out the obviousness of the studio-influenced audio deposits from Ainsworth that rarely, if ever, line up accordingly to the movements of the character’s mouth. One could argue this intentional as Pinocchio himself is a wooden puppet, but the design of the boy himself is dull to even look at from a colorful perspective, in turn feeling like Zemeckis directly took the puppet from the 1940 original and incorporated him into a film with a completely different form of animation style. On top of this, it’s strange that a film that is 8 minutes longer than its aforementioned predecessor still feels like it’s being abruptly rushed throughout a pacing scheme that sacrifices an abundance of subplots and characters in its wake. I previously mentioned Erivo’s blue faerie being a victim of this cause, but beyond her the cameo a minute concept corresponds to little to no impact from the various appearances, rendering each of them pointless, but beyond that deducing the script to a hodgepodge of various directions that never converge towards one cohesive direction. Finally, while all of these aspects shred the integrity of the finished product tragically, none of them offend quite as devastating as that of the dialogue and ensuing comedic material. For some strange reason, Disney decided to incorporate as many contemporary references as a teenage comedy, with the effectiveness of their various punchlines feeling designated purely to children under 9-years-old. If lack of effectiveness was the biggest problem, I could forgive most of the intent. However, the dependency and dedication of their cause completely eviscerates the timeless charms and appeal of the original movie, stamping it with a dated lifespan that already feels worn and improper with a Chris Pine joke among the many examples.

OVERALL
Robert Zemeckis’ “Pinocchio” is the latest addition to a stacking pile of uninspired and underwhelming live action Disney adaptations, with little in the way of positive returns to justify its juxtaposed creativity. Like its titular protagonist, it’s a soulless wooden puppet that is having its strings continuously tugged in the wrong direction, with no conscience to guide it to feeling like a real film.

My Grade: 4/10 or D