Directed By Kay Cannon

Starring – Camila Cabello, Billy Porter, Idina Menzel

The Plot – A modern movie musical with a bold take on the classic fairy tale. Our ambitious heroine (Cabello) has big dreams and with the help of her fab Godmother (Porter), she perseveres to make them come true.

Rated PG for suggestive material and adult language

Cinderella – Official Trailer | Prime Video – YouTube

POSITIVES

– Flourishing style. Without question, the single biggest benefit from the latest adaptation of the Cinderella folklore is that of the vibrancy of identity instilled from the combination of three-dimensional set designs and top shelf wardrobes that play into the single biggest element of visual escapism within the film. There’s a balance of color coordination and experimentation that not only brings forth an abundance of eye-popping cinematic allure, but also a personality within the designs that allows this to stand out from the abundance of fellow Cinderella adaptations, from even the last decade, that seem to be stacking. The gowns transform our leading ladies for the single biggest moments of their lives, further playing into the transformative qualities of the titular character herself, whose sparkling elegance is only futher elevated by the evolution of colors and corresponding cloths that weave themselves into a teleporting tapestry of top value diligence that pays off superbly in seeing her in a completely new light.

– Sparkling spectacle. It’s strange that the same woman, Kay Cannon, who directed the raunchiest comedy of the previous decade, in “Blockers”, supplants her second directorial effort with a musical with no shortage of class and sophistication for the occasion. What’s most evident here is her documentation of the environment, sifting through various angles, near and far, as well as invasive dance choreography from an army of dancers and singers that solidifies the big stage feel most prominent in these musicals turned movies from so long ago. It convinces audiences through a fleshing out of an intimate romance narrative between two people being elevated for a big stakes environmental feel, giving us a radiancy of emotions told through the universal language of dance, which polishes the canvas with many contributing factors playing to a greater cause, all the while feeding into the commentary of the townspeople from within who see these people and matters in ways that quite literally spell it out in the most majestically elaborate means possible for our delight.

– Idina Menzel. If nothing else, the critically acclaimed singer once again solidifies her brand with a scene-stealing turn that serves as the lone-detected character evolution against a backdrop of forgettable characters and one-dimensional personalities. There’s a naturalistic quality to her character that is never as over the top or grating on the nerves of the audience for the way she’s directed, instead outlining a flawed emotional embodiment that not only prescribes depth to an antagonist of requirement for the film, but also balances Menzel’s enchanting vocal prowess with an equally conveying emotional depth for acting that affords her the freedom to make the character her own, and breakout with a degree of expression not afforded to her animated turns in the “Frozen” franchise. She’s easily the shining light of the movie for me, and elevates this cast far beyond what it rightfully deserves by giving into the flawed characteristics of the character that make her more compelling than the titular character ever could attain.

NEGATIVES

– Lacking subtleties. When you finish “Cinderella”, you start to understand the wet towel embodiment of its intentions, which are practically slapped across the face of its audience, for better or worse. For my money, I can get behind a movie with substantial social commentary to enhance an ages old formula, but here it’s conveyed in an obvious and heavy-handed manner so forcefully rendered that it sets the woke movement back by ten years. Even if you can forgive the fairy godmother being played by a male actor in this respect, it’s the reactionary deconstruction of the Cinderella story that is most frustrating, taking the single most insignificant details about the story, and fleshing them out into a revolutionary tale so desperate of deeper significance that it creates a problem in a environment where there isn’t one, all in the effort to pad out the arduous pacing, to which we will get to later. Not since 2018’s “Black Christmas” has a movie pounded its material lessons into the head of its audience, and it makes “Cinderella” a shell of a movie whose only purpose is a catalyst for a greater cause to which this story holds no significance towards. Reaching to say the least.

– Music cues. From the very first song taking us through Janet Jackson’s “Rhythm Nation”, I knew I would be in for an inane and mindless experience that lacks context beyond that of a word or theme in question within the scene. It doesn’t exist for the aforementioned track, but for those like “Material Girl” for Madonna, or “Somebody to Love” by Queen, it points to an abstract reaching within the confines of materialism or love as mumbled by the minimalist approach of its actors, and stitches them into the context of a scene in a way that is every bit topical as it is practical for what’s expected. The tracks themselves are horrendously performed with an abundance of autotuned captivity, and continuously broke my immersive investment to the film every five minutes or so, without any semblance of momentum being built for the world so audibly illustrated with the spontaneity of a Mack truck colliding with a nitro-glycerine factory.

– Flat casting. It’s easy to interpret that this is a vehicle for Cabello, but when you consider that her emotional range isn’t up to the task of telling the challenging and complex issues with a woman judged and condemned by her social disposition, it’s only the start of the bigger picture of problems under the umbrella of this ensemble. Cabello herself is fine enough from a musical performance perspective, but when asked to do the heavy lifting of these life altering sequences underwhelms dramatically, and when coupled with the virtually non-existent chemistry of that she shares with on-screen love interest, Nicholas Galitzine, freezes over any connection or appeal to its audience waiting patiently for something substantial to tie them over. The supporting cast is equally forgettable, especially that of Pierce Brosnan or Minnie Driver, who sleep through roles that are the very definition of paycheck performances, and prove that the problem isn’t just limited to a lack of experience, but instead a misjustice of direction that undercuts each of their appeal consistently.

– Technical inferiorities. Could the computer-generation of the effects for the movie be any worse? I say this because the wooden and emotionless designs of the three mice plague them almost immediately for standing out within a cloud of artificiality, leaving them as the least interesting characters in a story that originally involves them greatly. Thankfully, the C.G is used sparingly in a way that doesn’t overwhelm or oversaturate the integrity of the finished product, but considering this is 2021, and animal designs like these still persist, it more than makes for a momentum-halting investment in the context of the scene, and constantly reminds us of Disney’s absence from the integrity of this project. In addition to the mice, there are some artificialities in the backdrops that come and go with a complete lack of influence from the actors that dance and interact from within its shadows, solidifying a forgettable rendering at best, with a hollow, soulless enveloping at worst.

– Uninvesting story. When the film isn’t sifting through the familiar beats of expectations within a story that spans the silver screen over seventy years, it’s subjected to a minimalist approach that is quite literally hindered abruptly throughout. This is because of the incorporation of over thirty songs to the finished product of the film, but beyond that the remainder of the story beats itself, which is about thirty minutes of material in a nearly two hour run time. This obviously creates problems with the pacing, which start almost immediately during the first act, and don’t ever subdue during the transitions to the second and third, which persist without even a single solitary instance of momentum gained between transitions. In fact, there’s a very distracting element to the scatter-brained storytelling that keeps it from feeling accessible in even the most limited of terms, and makes this one of the more boring experiences in 2021, which is notable in a year when I found something compelling in films like “Paw Patrol” or “The Boss Baby: Family Business”.

– Forgettable emphasis. The final scenes of the movie further played into the sum of the parts, in that this is very much a film lacking of any element of even momentary drama for the sake of something remotely memorable. The climax of this movie (If you can call it that), just kind of runs out of screen time, and ties matters up in a way that is every bit convenient as it is inconsequential in the long run of these people who change at the drop of the hat. On that front, the characterization itself is as forgettable as the need to even call this a Cinderella property, undercutting arc’s in a way that doubles down on spontaneity, and gives us payoff’s that never have any semblance of a moment to materialize conflict in anything that eclipses more than a single scene. It leaves this feeling like an experience that I struggle to grasp even an hour after seeing it, but one that brings with it a redeeming element, in which none of it will maintain notoriety by the time you read this review, allowing us the memory-cleansing serenity of forgettability when the clock strikes midnight.

My Grade: 3/10 or F