Rapture Palooza

 

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7/10

A straight to DVD release that is definitely one of the funniest films of the year. Craig Robinson stars as Satan. He inherits the earth after the rapture takes care of 3/4 of the population. The film reminded me of a mixture of Dogma and Idiocracy because it could easily be written by Kevin Smith or Trey Parker/Matt Stone. This is definitely the role of a lifetime for Robinson who is responsible for most of the laughs and great lines. That leaves two problems that aren’t a big deal, but clearly obvious. The first, No other character even comes close to having the meaning that Robinson does. God even makes an appearance (I won’t spoil who it is), and it’s just not as big of a deal because this film totally focuses on Craig. The other problem is that some scenes step on some real good laughs by lasting a little too long. It’s like the cameraman forgot to stop the camera from rolling just to see if he could get another laugh out of his actors. Overall, Rapture Palooza might be the funniest film i have seen this year. It’s these kind of films that make me always take a 2nd look at straight to DVD releases. Sometimes, they are better than 80% of the stuff that is in theaters. There are way too many stars to name, but Anna Kendrick, Rob Coddry, Ana Gaestyer, Paul Scheer and John Michael Higgins to name a few. I definitely recommend you give Rapture Palooza a shot. It’s only 84 minutes, so it’s definitely an easy sit. I can also imagine that there are some amazing improv deleted scenes on the DVD.

Now You See Me

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7/10

This is the best example of cast carrying a script. The first hour of this movie is really well done, and then it takes a turn for the unbelievable. It’s funny that this film is about magic because it is every bit as unbelievable as the sport it exploits. The difference between this being a good movie though is the cast. It was great to see Jesse Eisenberg and Woody Harrelson back together (Zombieland) and Michael Caine with Morgan Freeman (Christopher Nolan’s Batman trilogy). Freeman is excellent as a former magician who reveals all of four horseman’s secrets. You really have to suspend disbelief for some of the craziest magic illusions you have ever seen. The ending is kind of satisfying, but has a twist that is very easy to see coming. While the film is good, it suffers from a weak script that keeps it from becoming as good as The Prestige. It is however better than the other magic film of this year, Burt Wonderstone……..WAY BETTER. I recommend this film to anyone if you can go watch a movie and suspend a lot of disbelief. Basically, if you appreciated the logic of The Fast and Furious series, then you will love this.

The Hangover 3

 

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5/10

If there is one major problem that plagues this film it is boring.Compared to the other two films, nothing major happens in this one. This will make it easily forgettable in 15 years when people look back on the series. The movie genre is a comedy, but it never gives you more than a light chuckle or two. To me, this seems more like a drama because of the touching aspects like the death of Alan’s father and the loss of friendship. Zach Galafanakis has gotten to the point where every role is the same. I loved him more in movies like The original Hangover and Due Date, but this role is old and played out. It’s the same for Ken Jeong who plays Leslie Chow. Positive aspects of this movie is the performance of John Goodman. He really rocked it as the villain in this film and usually any more he is in. I only recommend this film if you have seen the other two so you can finish out the series. By recommended, i mean to just wait until DVD. It’s definitely not worth the $10 movie ticket.

Iron Man 3

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6/10

Before i begin my review i would like to point out the reviewers who will give a lot of movies a 10/10. This is especially the case when they see a superhero movie. Just because they left the movie with a good feeling they will give it a perfect score. To me, there has only been between 10 and 15 perfect score movies ever. The less you give out perfect scores, the more it will mean to a movie when you do give it a 10/10. With that said, a lot of people will give this a 10/10, but this movie certainly has it’s flaws. I won’t get into too many spoilers but The Mandarin character was TOTALLY ruined by this movie. The Mandarin is supposed to be every bit as smart as Tony Stark and the biggest menace that he faces in the comics and they totally bitched this character out. It’s a shame because Ben Kingsley is easily the best actor on the set of this movie and he is nothing more than a joke. Don Cheadle is also on sleeping mode in this movie and doesn’t find a lot to do. This movie also didn’t do a lot with the 3D effects. I don’t really see a big reason to pay 13 dollars for a 3D experience. On the positive side, Guy Pearce was amazing as a ruthless businessman who proposes a dangerous experiment to Tony Stark. I really felt that he was the best part of this movie. The action was also the best of the three Iron Man films that included an incredible scene with the destruction of Tony Stark’s house. It was also pretty cool to see William Sadler and Miguel Ferrer as the president and vice president, respectively. Overall, i would recommend this film in theaters but not in 3D. It’s not something that is needed at all. I would rank this as the 2nd best Iron Man film behind the original.

Pain and Gain

 

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8/10

This honestly has to be the surprise of the year so far. This movie tells a story of how it all went wrong for three bodybuilders who just wanted the American dream. This movie stars heavy hitters like Mark Wahlberg and The Rock, but it’s Ed Harris and Tony Shaloub who really steal the movie with incredible performances that differ from the roles they are normally cast in. This is easily the best Michael Bay film in existence because simply put; i am not a Michael Bay fan. Some of the scenes in this movie border on the horror genre because of the excessive use of gore. Overall, a good movie that i would definitely recommend. This movie will probably be overshadowed by films like The Great Gatsby or The Hangover part 3, but i think this one is definitely worth a look.

Scary Movie 5

 

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2.5/10

This movie is close to being the worse film of the year for me. If not for the catastrophe that was Movie 43, this film would definitely make history as not only the worst film of the year, but of the last five years easily. With the exception of one scene, i didn’t laugh one time in this entire film. It’s a shame because the first two Scary Movie’s were actually really good and filled with laughs. This franchise has been on a down slope since getting rid of the Wayans Brothers. This film makes the movie A Haunted House look like Casablanca. Most of the movies represented in this film aren’t horror movies at all and they don’t put any effort in hiding that fact. The oddest thing to me was the fact that almost NONE of the scenes that were shown in the trailers were in the movie. I guess they all went on the chopping block because they are nowhere to be found. This movie clocks in at 75 measly minutes that feel like a lifetime. There were many points when i almost gave up. I don’t recommend this film for anyone; not even the biggest mindless idiots walking the planet. Nobody will or SHOULD like this movie

Admission

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7/10

A pretty good film about a woman (Tina Fey) who works in the Princeton admissions office and finds out that her son who she gave up for adoption is a prodigy who will be applying there. Going into this film i expected it to be a comedy with people like Tina Fey and Paul Rudd, but i was very surprised to see that this is every bit the romantic drama films of the 90’s. One thing i really liked about this film was the way it taught you about how hard it really is to get into these Ivy league schools. I also think this is a film that those schools don’t want you to see, as the snob “we’re better than you” reputation is presented in a crystal clear light. I also enjoyed Rudd as he has shown the ability to pull of comedies and romantic films. At this point in his career, i am a big fan and will usually watch anything he is in. The only thing i didn’t like about this film was it’s dragging at parts. It does take this film a good 30 minutes to finally get you into it, but once you get there it does present a very original story. If you know me, you know originality gets extra points in my book, and that is why i recommend giving Admission a shot. The ladies will love it.

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone

 

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4.5/10

This film is by far one of the worst of the year. It’s not funny even in the least and has problems deciding if it is a comedy or a drama. I personally think it works better as a drama, but it’s still a very poor written film. It’s a shame to see how far Steve Carrell and Jim Carrey have fallen in their careers. The only slight saving graces in this film were the performances of Alan Arkin and James Gandolfini. Other than that, it’s a complete waste of anybody’s time. The ending is so unbelievable even for a comedy that it left me completely speechless. The biggest tragedy about this movie is the fact that Steve Carrell’s character is the most unlikeable guy and rude to Olivia Wilde’s character, but we are supposed to believe that she falls for him?? TRASH

Spring Breakers

 

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4/10

WOW!!! This movie was awful. I will go ahead and get the good things out of the way first. James Franco gives an amazing performance as a rapper/drug dealer who serves as the main ally of the girls. There were times that i even forgot that Mr. Franco was even in the movie. Other than that, there is not one single redeeming quality to this shitfest. The dialogue is completely awful between the characters, so much so that at times they repeat the same lines twice. The camera angles mix into conversations so badly that it looks like they came out of the Spike Lee school of cinematography. But at least Spike Lee has a purpose for some of the meaningless shots that he includes in his films. This movie treats you like you are a five year old who doesn’t know the extreme dangers of Spring Break. Apparently this is the message they are trying to convey as all four girls (Selena Gomez most of all) are the dumbest airheads i have probably ever come across in cinema. So wait a minute, there are bad guys who do drugs and only want to have sex with innocent girls at Spring Break? GET THE HELL OUT OF TOWN!!! This movie at times did remind me of Alpha Dog as it becomes apparent that these girls might not have a happy ending, but what Alpha Dog did different was make us care about their characters by developing them better. I didn’t care for one second what happened to these spoiled brats who rob a bank just to pay for Spring Break. I only recommend this film on Red Box and that is only if you don’t have high standards when it comes to film. If you really want a crime movie about four strong females, i recommend Set it Off. It’s a little high strung on the dramatic at times, but it’s message is a hell of a lot better than Spring Breakers.

21 and Over

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6/10

The biggest problem with this movie is it’s unoriginality. It’s a movie that tries to take parts from The Hangover, Sex Drive and Eurotrip, but never quite succeeds at it. There were a couple of good laughs in the film and the dialogue definitely sets a precedent for the future of profane comedy, but overall it is just too inconsistent to carry the comedy torch with the movies it tries to take from. The two main characters aren’t even original. One is a mixture of Vince Vaughn, Shia Lebouf and Stiffler from American Pie. The other one has to be Justin Long’s brother because he mocks him to a tee. If you do see this movie, one part in particular made me cross my legs in pain. The main guy gets a teddy bear……..well you know what? Figure it out for yourself.

A Good Day To Die Hard

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5.5/10

A problematic action packed film that will easily be forgotten in the Die Hard series. While i don’t think this is the worst Die Hard of the series (Die Hard 2), i do feel like this is going to be the one that people will have the hardest time remembering. This is because nothing amazing happens in the film that will define the series. The action was great as always and there was a great twist towards the end of the film, but it doesn’t go much further than that. I enjoyed the work of Jai Courtney when he wasn’t being a sniveling crybaby whining about his dad never being there. The setting for the final shootout is so unbelievable even by Die Hard standards that it’s hard to take seriously. I would recommend waiting for DVD on this one for all of you Die Hard fans. I still think 1 and 3 are the only ones i truly enjoyed of the series

Identity Thief

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7/10

A very funny movie that turns in great performances by Jason Bateman (Big fan) and Melissa MCcarthy. I also enjoyed the side performances of villains like Robert Patrick, T.I, and the always funny Eric Stonestreet. I did have a couple of problems with the movie and i will mention those in the bottom of this review. I recommend this movie for someone who wants to laugh and have a great time at the movies. It’s better than 95% of movies that are currently in theaters and for that reason alone you should see it.SPOILER ALERTS!!!!!! DO NOT READ ON IF YOU DON’T WANT TO BE SPOILED1. Jason Bateman is a complete idiot and he deserved to have his identity ripped off. Who would be dumb enough to fall for the scheme that he did??2. The workers of the bank that the two main characters ripoff are completely not following bank procedures and should be fired for letting them be able to ripoff Jon Favreau’s money.3. Apparently, the cops had no interest in pursuing Jason Bateman any further for stealing that money. After he escapes the police, they don’t check highway cameras or hotel cameras to secure the identity of Bateman and where they might find him